Let It Roll

I started a post about Facebook but decided it was going to take more time than I wanted to devote right then to complete my thoughts (surprise!) so I abandoned it in favor of something a little less time consuming because I am watching American Idol and it’s hard to think clearly when I’m focused on JLo’s skin and Steven Tyler’s braid or whatever that thing is in his hair.

[That is one long sentence.]

I’ll save that post for another day, but today I thought it might be fun to let it roll.

From my head to my fingertips, here are the first ten things that come to mind.

1. First of all, can I just say that we are gearing up for yet another SNOWSTORM here in West Virginia. You cannot understand my frustration about that because OHMYWORD ENOUGHALREADY. I am tired of shoveling and sliding and freezing and checking the darn weather channel to see if I’ll be able to get off of our hill every morning. I’ll be so glad when April gets here.

2. Apparently the crazy weather has the residents of West Virginia flying their crazy flags at full staff. Take this joker for instance. I laughed out loud at the story, but really he needs some serious help.

3. Tears ran down my cheeks as Chris Medina’s story was shared on American Idol Wednesday night. What a heartbreaking story for these two young kids. Just thinking about it, my eyes are filled with tears.

4. Report cards come home today. My sweet boy is hoping for straight A’s. And so is his mama.

5. If you haven’t watched “Hot In Cleveland” you are missing out. It is quite hysterical and mostly because Betty White is a hoot!

6. I spent two hours and twelve minutes on the phone with four different representatives from AT&T and Apple yesterday. The two gals at Apple were friendly and helpful and finally my iPhone 4 can accept and send picture texts.

7. If you are new around here, you should check out my new “About Me” page. I get frequent e-mails asking if I found love in jail. So, I’d like to set the record straight, right here on this blog. I did NOT meet McDaddy in prison. Rather, we went to high-school together and ‘hooked up’ during our senior year. In fact, I was first attracted to his best friend.

8. McDaddy tutored me in Trigonometry and we kissed for the first time on his 16th birthday.

9. McDaddy has always loved to drive, SO, I’m not sure what was more special to him. Turning 16 so he could finally drive OR our first kiss. I’d love for him to answer that.

10. The nasty bronchitis crud is still hanging around. I am MUCH better, but the nagging nasty cough is a reminder that I am not completely well just yet. I need to be well because I need to get my butt back in the gym without fear of coughing up a lung the second my heart rate gets the slightest bit elevated.

This is a great day to come out from behind the bushes and introduce yourself. Oh, and for added enjoyment, share a random fact about yourself.

So, what are you waiting on?

Let it roll!

Stuck In A Rut

Each week I wonder if I’ll be able to keep this “Things I Learned This Week” gig moving along.

And each week, I find myself learning some incredibly weird stuff.  Hopefully some of that weird stuff will help somebody out in blog land and the information will not be wasted.

So, in no particular order I present to you… Things I Learned THIS week.

1. When your four year old gets the Dark Knight Tech Mega Wings for his birthday, he will absolutely love them. They will, however, aggravate the snot out of you and every other object sitting on any table within a three feet radius.

2. A pinata will bring joy every. single. time.

3.  A group of first-grade boys will enjoy scrapbooking for their cub-scout scrapbooking badge. You should take more than one sheet of sports, construction, fishing and cars stickers though.

4. Getting a new pink DELL computer is comparable to driving a new BMW after driving a broke down hooptie.


Ahem. Sorry. I didn’t mean to yell.

But I really am thankful!

5. When it has rained for a sweet forever, weeks on end it is probably a good idea that you keep your van on the pavement. If not, you might find yourself stuck in a rut that you cannot get out of.

6. If you find  your van stuck in a rut, three burly tree-trimming guys CAN rock your van out of the rut if you get on the gas and give it all its got.

7. If you find that your van is stuck in a rut, you should probably compose your hysterical self long enough to snap some pictures of your van or else your be wishing you had. You will also be wishing McDaddy and his beloved JEEP was at home so they could winch you out.

 There you have it.

Another week of incredibly weird stuff.

Head over to Musings Of A Housewife for more things people learned this week. Oh, and if you need a good laugh, be sure to read this post at her place first!

Looking For Direction

What would you do if you knew you would not fail?
Recently I heard this quote and it has taken root in my brain. I have thought a lot about roads in my life that I turned off of, afraid that I would never see the end of the street. If I knew I wouldn’t fail though, I would still be trudging down some of them, my hopes high and my worries light.
Life is not like this though and so I’ve been thinking about various incidents  in my life, how they have changed me and how changing my behavior would have changed my life.
A couple of years ago, McDaddy received an early Christmas present. The McInLaws and I went together to purchase a TomTom GPS System. For those of you living under a rock wondering what a TomTom is… it is the smart choice in personal navigation. In other words, this system when plugged into a vehicle can navigate you to any destination in the US, England or Canada. On a recent trip, this new loyal friend guided us from our drive-way right to the door of our destination. She was a little peeved when we missed a turn, and then again when we turned into a scrapbook store parking lot to kill time because we arrived a little early. It didn’t know our plans had changed and she became increasingly agitated.

She needs to take a chill pill.
I thought about this little system, and its benefits to me if I could hook the thing up to my brain. It would give me a swift kick in the tail when I was about to turn onto a wrong road. Not that I have a miserable life, but because I can use all the help I can get. For instance, if I had a TomTom, I would not open my mouth to say the wrong thing because my loyal friend would be there to tell me I was about to make a wrong turn. He would save me the guilt I would feel afterward and save the poor soul I offended the reason to be offended. 

Seriously, I’m working on it.
I can think of at least two people right off the top of my head that could have benefitted from TomToms services in the past month. These two people have made decisions that have significantly changed the way people viewed them and its my belief a little navigation on their part could have avoided the crash courses they caused.
Oh….. and when I didn’t comlete my Graduate School thesis, TomTom would have been there to guide me along the road to see that I finished that silly thing so I wouldn’t have failure looming over my head. I would also know that the quote, “What would you do if you knew you would not fail” had a lot more meaning to me than I would  like to admit. You see, I have failed. My thesis is nothing more than words on my computer hard drive now. I have no intention of finishing and quite frankly, I am sometimes sorry that I even started grad school, because now I have to admit that I have unfinished business. I have no desire to finish now…but, the end result is still the same no matter what my intentions are at this point. I could list all the reasons why I didn’t finish the thesis – entitled “Gun Use in West Virginia Domestic Violence Cases,” but seriously, who even cares about that anyway. I wanted to write a thesis on something cool like murder or meyhem, but, the chair of my thesis committee had other ideas.

I have other ideas about him now too, but, that’s a whole ‘nother blog.
If TomTom would have been on the job back then, he would have told me to back myself up, pick my own thesis topic and drive quickly to the end of the trail to get it finished. My grad school days did produce a group of great friends and provided me with lots of knowledge about Criminology, Statistics, Criminal law, Grant Writing and Counseling. If nothing else, I sure learned how to be a criminal during my academic pursuit at Marshall University Graduate School. The really sad part is that I was at the end of the road ready to pull into Masters Avenue and my thesis was not and is not as of this date finished. TomTom sure could have aided me in making a different turn to make those two years really mean something. Its all water under the bridge now and TomTom has rerouted me. Its not always easy to forget though and I’ve not forgotten it, even after eleven years. I have other interests in life now and couldn’t say with 100% clarity that I would finish it if I had the chance to go back. Instead of focusing on that, I will spend the next howevermany years routing myself down roads that will have significance in my life – raising my boys, nurturing my marriage and maybe even going back to work when my sweet angels are both in school. 

I am proud of what I have achieved and would like to think that I’ve learned something from the navigation system of my life. I’ve learned that its not always about the destination. There are so many wonderful things to see on the route, if your too involved in the destination you may miss out on the chance to make friends, change your course or learn something. I’ve learned this the hard way.  Winston Churchill once said, Failure is not fatal, it is the courage to continue that counts…. I will continue to focus on the road ahead of me and not look back down that long road I turned off of eleven years ago.
When you find yourself on the WRONG road, take advice from your internal  TomTom – at the next intersection make a RIGHT turn.

An Annoying Post

Every morning while getting dressed, I listen to K-Love.

As I applied the last bit of make-up to my sleepy eyes, I had to laugh as I listened to the news story about the “most annoying words,” as reported by 47 percent of Americans surveyed in a Marist College poll.

I am good friends with the words.


“You Know”


“It is what it is”

And, “At the end of the day”

Friends, I can honestly say that I say whatever about 324 times per day. And, I’ve been known to throw out “It is what it is” and “At the end of the day” several times over the past few days.


See. I told you I say it all the time.

McDaddy would add “Amazing” and “think good thoughts” to the list.

There are lots of things that annoy me.

*Big gasp from the crowd*

McDaddy mentioned he wanted to get to bed early.

I mentioned I’d be joining him just as soon as I wrote a blog post about things that annoy me

And he responded with something like, “So you’ll be in bed by next year?”

And I was all like, “Yes, something like that!”

(Am I too old to say, “I was all like?”)

I’ll just start by saying that this list is just a sampling of the big ole stack of annoyances that aggravate the snot out of me.

Given the time and the energy I could clog up this here wordpress dashboard with things that annoy me. I’ll do my best to keep it short.

Things that annoy me, in no particular order….

  • My stupid computer cord. Remember a few weeks ago when I made a plea to McDaddy for a new computer cord and y’all had my back and pleaded with him on my behalf? Well, your pleas were heard and he ordered a new cord for my hoopty laptop. Only the laptop is still having problems. As it turns out, it is not the cord that was the problem. It is the jack in the back of the laptop that is the problem. Just my luck. Anyway, now McDaddy has to take the laptop apart and work his magic to repair it.
  • When the grocery bags rip before I get them into the house.
  • When the Asplundh folks block our one-lane road for weeks to cut tress down trees marked for death by American Electric Power and I return home to find 4/6 of them sitting on the side of the road doing absolutely nothing four days in a row.
  • When Amazing Race on my TiVo is replaced with someone on Sixty Minutes flapping their jaws about something not nearly as interesting as ten teams travelling around the world in a quest to win $1,000,000. NFL should get an earlier start.
  • When McDaddy leaves the lid up on the washing machine.
  • When a telemarketer who can barely speak the English language rings my phone asking me questions I can barely understand.
  • The people that call from the vehicle warranty place telling me that my vehicle warranty is about to expire if I don’t hold on and talk to the annoying person on the other line that has no clue what model or make of car I drive.
  • Commercials
  • When people park crooked and take up two spaces
  • When I chip my toe-nail polish after a pedicure.
  • When something doesn’t work as it should (Roomba, vacuum cleaner, the candy-filled telephones I bought for the boys at Wal-greens yesterday)
  • A 20% remaining battery warning on my beloved iPhone
  • When people don’t follow rules
  • When cars are approaching a construction area and instead of merging into traffic, they drive past the stopped traffic to the front of the line and they flip on their blinker expecting the front car to ‘let them in’
  • The K. County School Board
  • Flossing
  • Flat Dr. Pepper
  • Temper Tantrums
  • Cluttered stuff
  • Needing gas when I’m in a super big hurry
  • Slow internet service
  • Finding a spelling mistake in a blog post after posting it
  • Dust
  • When the boys hound me about “watching a show in the van every single time we get in it to go somewhere”
  • The toes on my left foot because they will not go together like the ones on my right foot.
  • Clumpy mascara
  • Hair products that make my hair feel like plastic

Okay, I guess you get the picture.

What can I say? It is what it is.


At the end of the day, I’m just a crazy-stay-at-home-mom with a truck-load of quirks.

Thanks for stopping by here for a daily dose of crazy.

Have a great weekend, y’all!

Over The River And Through The Woods

Since I’ve talked so much about McDaddy’s heap this week, I thought I might as well go ahead and finish out the week by talking about it again.

Not that I particularly love the vehicle, but mainly because every time I walk outside and see the thing it reminds me of my sweet hubby and how badly I miss him.

I wrote this post some time ago over on my other blog. You know, the one I had on mySpace before From Inmates To Playdatesmade its debut into the blogosphere. I thought it might be fun to share this today because I am a little pressed for time due to an unexpected appointment with the gyno.

I know.


But, I try to keep it real over here and sadly, all my days cannot be filled with shiny, happy thoughts about Saturn Skys, iPhones and sweet little boys.

There are other things that creep up from time to time.

Like almost plowing my mailbox down.

And stupid deployments.

And unexpected gyno appointments.

I’ll not bore you with the minor details of the actual excavationprocedure. Just know that I would just about rather be any. place. on. the. planet. than being tortured by the gynocologist. Hopefully, your day is going better than mine….

Somewhere in the deep South McDaddy is rolling his eyes in shame because I put his heap in the midst of all this nastiness. Anyway, without further ado….

The Post.

Today, I accompanied McDaddy and his posse from the JeepinWV club for an off-roading extravaganza.
There were 15 jeeps.
And 34 people.


The youngest was our three year old, Alex. The oldest was in his 50’s.
I could pretend that it was all hunky and dory.

But lying is a sin.

I watched as my sweet McDaddy navigated creeks, rocks and dusty trails. I watched him in all his glory, doing the one thing that he loves.to.do. Our boys were thrilled to be in their “favorite vehicle” with their favorite person. 

It is 10:52pm.
And, my day was far from exciting.
Before I get into the hairy details of our day, let me preface this saga by saying that McDaddy is a safe, talented navigator and that I feel horrible for being such a wimp.
With that said… I’m need to be honest and tell you that I was absolutely scared to death.
I’m talking B-I-G-B-A-B-Y.
I’m talking face buried in my hands, praying for our safety, I’m afraid I ruined the day – scaredy cat.

What is it about hanging on the side of a mountain, slippin’ and slidin’ in the mud, spinning your tires while you try to make it over rocks and through creeks that is exciting?
It was something….
My excitement meter must have been off.
As much fun as I had hanging with my fellas, I would have to say that off-roading is not what I was meant to do.
I didn’t mind the rough ride
-or driving on the level trail
-or listening to the trash talk on the CB
-or watching the kids play in the water
-or taking pictures of the jeeps getting hung up in various water holes and dusty ruts
-or the rain
-or the briars
-or, even peeing in the creek.

Seriously, all of that was loads of fun.

The thing that bothered me was that .4 miles into the ride, I knew I had made a mistake. As we watched two jeeps make their way up the steep hill after stalling and spinning their tires, I started to cry.
Probably not a good sign.

But, it was our turn. And, there was pressure. And, McDaddy’s reputation was on the line.

I told him to just GO! He drove the jeep up that hill like a gray squirrel making his way up a maple tree.

Without incident.

Luckily, we never ended up in a mess like this….


Because seriously, I probably would have peed my pants.
Tears were streaming down my cheeks.
And I knew I had made a big mistake.
But, it was too late.
I tried to bite the bullet. And take it like a big girl. I pictured myself at my funeral

Then, I bit my lip, my jaw and my tongue because I was ready to scream.
I could not hide my fear.
And for the next six hours, I endured.

And decided I had made two off-roading trips today.
My first.
And my last.

Driving Me Crazy

There is a reason West Virginia is called, “Wild, Wonderful, West Virginia”.
I’m guessing that name has nothing to do with the drivers on our interstate highways.

Oh, internets, I may need an additional blood pressure pill after this post.
Why is it that some drivers feel like it is safe to send an e-mail on their blackberry, chug a latte, retrieve coordinates on their GPS, apply mascara and enjoy the happy meal that is sprawled out across their lap.
All while they are operating a moving vehicle. Seriously. I Just. Don’t. Get. It.
And I’m just going to throw this out there… in some instances the value of aforementioned techno devices is substantially more than the hoopty they are driving.
Just Sayin’
Some days, it is all I can do to make it home with all of my sanity. Because my sanity? Sometimes it gets left on the interstate because there is a rude driver or two who decides they don’t have the four seconds it would take to let another vehicle merge in front of them.

And speaking of vehicles, I was highly amused during our recent drive to Washington, DC by the vast number of  people who use their vehicles as moving billboards by plastering bumper stickers all. over. the. back. bumper. 

You know the ones of which I speak. 

“I’m a gun-totin’ democrat”
“Honk if parts fall off”
“Long Live Kurt Cobain”
“If you can’t feed them, don’t breed them”
“Don’t blame me, I voted for Kerry”
“I wish my car retained as much gas as I do”
“My other car is a broom”
“Hillary is my homegirl”
“My other ride is Your Mom”
“Drive It Like You Stole It”
Cheap entertainment at its finest.
But, the all-time, quickest route to road rage for me?

It happens when you are in a construction zone and  drivers are “encouraged” to merge because of an upcoming lane closing.

Please, please, please tell me that you are not one of the people who refuse to merge into the “open” lane, instead opting to travel in the lane that is closing until the last.possible.second and then expect all of the drivers who have merged when they were supposed to let you in because you are out of roadway. 

Because those people? Those people aggravate the snot out of me.

What about you? Got a favorite bumper sticker?